That was the subject line in an email I received today. I couldn’t find the results from that IQ test, but apparently I’d taken one in 2005 that yielded a score of 129 earned me the title of Visual Mathematician. The email goaded me with “Think you’ve gotten smarter in the past year? Take the test again.” I followed the link and took the Super IQ Test. It’s been three years since my last test, this time I yielded a score of 147 and earned my new title of Intuitive Investigator.

If I truly am this smart, why do I keep misspelling the same words? Why do books like James Joyce’s Ulysses and Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity’s Rainbow fill me with a sense of dread? Why can’t do math in my head or spell words out loud? Why do I accidentally call people with my butt?